a little piece of nice advice
Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t want your advice.
I really dislike unsolicited advice. I find it patronizing and offensive.
I know, I know, people are just trying to be helpful. But if I wanted help or advice, I would ask for it – believe me, I would. And I do. All the time. But when I don’t ask for advice, there’s a good reason: it’s because I don’t want it.
If you give me unsolicited advice, I will probably get impatient, maybe even angry. You may then be tempted to label my impatience and/or anger (which will make me even angrier!) as “resistance,” or “defensiveness.” It’s not. It’s my response to you trying to tell me what to do or how to live my life.
I am quite capable of living my own life, ups and downs, mistakes and all. I’m also skilled at tending and mending my broken self — I’ve had lots of practice thank you very much.
And I know that all things, joys and sorrows, will pass one day. So please let me be in my own misery 🙂
a little piece of nice advice
© 2018 punkie
a little piece of nice advice
i love you to bits,
you know i speak true,
but i hate when you think,
i don’t have a clue.
when I tell you a thing,
that happened today,
it’s just to inform you,
there’s no need to say:
“do this,” or “do that,”
or “why haven’t you tried?”
“you should” or “you shouldn’t”
or “you both could’ve died!”
if i tell you i’m sad,
or crying or down,
it’s my job, not yours,
to turn things around.
cheerful suggestions
come across as offensive,
and helpful instructions
make me seem defensive.
what i’d like you to do
is just listen and nod,
forget the repairs
and trying to play god.
when i want someone’s help,
with an issue or task,
rest assured, count on me,
you’re the first one i’ll ask.
until that day comes,
and your assistance is needed,
please remember occasions,
I have quietly pleaded:
“your intentions are good,
you clearly mean well,
but heavens to betsy
don’t make me yell:
i don’t need to be fixed,
i don’t crave your advice,
so shut the fuck up,
if you want to be nice!”
© 2018 Susan Macaulay. I invite you to share my poetry and posts widely, but please do not reprint, reblog or copy and paste them in their entirety without my permission. Thank you.
